Broken Heart

The son is battling a last stage cancer...

The daughter, the hope of the family... will be sitting for the final exam next week.. ( her birthday is next week too )

The two little ones... too young to understand what is going on..

Little kiddo asked , " kenapa ibu menangis ? ".. on her behalf I answered, " ibu sakit gigi ".

I lied.

The father chose to leave his family.

Easy way out.

I am very sorry to be a bit emotional about this.. but I am just a human. However, this anger will have to end now. I have no right to interfere in anyone's personal matter. Astaghfirullahalazim..

Children have the right to be happy. I hold strongly to that. The last thing the son need is a broken heart before his next radiotherapy. Therefore, spontaneously, I asked them, " Cuti sekolah nak pegi jalan-jalan kat Aquaria tak ? " They said yes :) It will be on Sunday (22/11), a day before the museum trip, insyaAllah..

InsyaAllah..I hope some how, some way.. Allah will help me to get the funding (never before I do 2 major programmes continuously for 2 days )

I pray and hope that there will be a rainbow for this family.. insyaAllah... May Allah bless them....

Note: The mother is selling "kerepek", as she can not work due to her son illness

Specially Yours #2 _Cutie Pie

She is a cute, smart cheeky little girl. Loves to sing, she is the entertainer at the ward.Honestly speaking.. she is ADORABLE!! Little Hani Liyana is an ALL ( Acute Lymphoblastik Leukimia ) patient, 4 years old. She was jumping up and down when she saw me at the ward the other day. Betul.. tak tipu :) Seorang kanak-kanak yang sangat manja & ceria.

I would not know what kind of treatments can help her, what medicine can cure her... but I know prayers are something that you & I can give. Not forgetting, I can try by widening the wings of the project that I have started a few weeks go.

Specially Yours #2 reached Adik Yana on Monday. Last week was her 4th birthday.

Her mom sent me the pictures in this post.

Her smile says it all.....

Happy Birthday Yana. We love you :)

Note 1 :Zack dearie, some of the items that you passed to me are in that parcel I sent to Adik Yana. May Allah bless you :)

Thank you everyone.. may Allah bless you..

Wonder People

" Apa yang penting... kerjasama... Apa yang penting... kerjasama... "

That was the program that I watched on my birthday recently, " Wonder Pets " . Guess who actually made me watch it....... mom & dad :) them so much !

While watching that story, I smiled. Because... that is how Wishing Well Programme works. "Kerjasama" :)

I received a lot of birthday wishes that comes together with inspirational/motivational

words that I definitely will keep in my heart. Thank you, thank you and thank you...

However, I would like to share those words & wishes with all of you who have been with me all the way.. When the childhood cancer patients smile... believe me, you are a part of it...

Semoga Allah membalas segala jasa baik anda semua...InsyaAllah..

Thank you Allah.. for the blessing that You gave.. Syukur Alhamdulillah...

I do not have Wonder Pets coming rescue me... but I definitely have Wonder People by my side..

Thank you all... May Allah bless you .. ALWAYS...


Tears Of A Child

I personally did not expect him to cry. Especially because that was our first conversation. He is 16, currently seeking treatment in Kelantan.

Having lost his father due to throat cancer last year, Adik Sharifuddin has now started his own journey in battling bone cancer that was just diagnosed recently. His sms was something like this.." Dah masuk dah chemo pod.4 hari lagi baru masuk ubat.. "

Maybe, he has kept the emotions to himself for so long. Therefore... the tears of a child fell the day I called him.

He no longer has both parents with him right now.Mother could not be located, and father has passed away. But I strongly believe, after this post, there will be a lot of people, young and old, offering a sprinkle of love for Adik Sharifuddin . In other hands.... insyaAllah, there will be new "extended family" members.

Currently, almost everyday I will be getting a new case. My resources are very limited but I believe, Allah works in mysterious ways.. InsyaAllah. He will be there for us, as long as we have faith in Him. For Adik Sharifuddin, it is very hard for me to visit him physically, as he is in Kubang Kerian, Kelantan. However, I believe.. distance is not an issue.

InsyaAllah... with His blessing.. something will workout... soon..

Sikit-sikit, lama-lama jadi bukit

In response to the plight highlighted in NST, Harian Metro and Berita Harian, a group of friends came together and came out with one cheque for Adik Shaidie. All I can say is... Syukur Alhamdulillah. All praise to Him.

What I can see is.. no matter how little amount we can contribute, that is not the issue. Sikit-sikit, lama- lama jadi bukit. What I received yesterday was a cheque with an amount of RM4K. Subhanallah.. to those who have donated, thank you very much. I personally have handed your donation to NSTP yesterday, together with a dear friend of mine, Mas.

Honestly, I did not expect that amount. Allah telah mengizinkan segalanya... Alhamdulillah.

Adik Shaidie's surgery has been postponed to 28th October 2009 (earlier scheduled was today, 21st October ) . Mari lah kita sama-sama berdoa agar dia dapat melalui pembedahan tersebut dengan selamat. InsyaAllah

Pergi Sekolah Tak ..?

She has been considered as under palliative care. Having been diagnosed of having leukemia at a very young age, she has been in and out of hospital for countless times. The chemotherapy failed on her.. now.. she is in the stage called " bertahan ". Oh yes, she is 13 years old now.

To get through to her is not that difficult, as she is bubbly. She has been sending me messages constantly. However, tonight, she did not reply to my sms.

It is because I asked her.." Pergi sekolah tak..?"

Most of the childhood cancer patients that I know are brilliant, clever and honest. Easier said.. good girls and good boys. I know she could not lie to me.. therefore, she chose to be silent.

A few weeks ago, her parents have asked for my help to constantly follow up on her schooling. It is because... after being away from school for so long, she has problem in making friends.

This is one of the issue that Wishing Well Programme is looking closely into. In helping the childhood cancer patients to regain back their confidence and be strong to face the world outside hospital. Honestly, I know it is difficult. However, it is not impossible.

I had a long talk with her... about school.. about friends... about life with cancer. InsyaAllah.. I strongly believe.. she can do it..

" Sincerely Yours "is a project that can help in this issue . I know there are many loving people out there who can help to boost the spirits of the little heroes. A note of encouraging words can definitely ignite the confidence in them.. insyaAllah...

p/s Thank you to all who have contacted me to be in the project.. Oh yes, this is an on going thing.. therefore.. there is no deadline for the cards/small gift. You can send it to me anytime :)

May Allah bless you ..

Project " Sincerely Yours " - DOs and DON'Ts

This is a really simple project that have crossed my mind in order to get more people spreading the love and care, as well as giving the support to the patients and family in their difficult moments. All you have to do is to send a card to the patients, as well as to the parents and siblings ( through me ). Siblings need support too, as there will times they will have to be on their own while parents accompanying the patients at the hospital.

I truly believe, it makes a difference when you know people care about you. I have seen that. Subhanallah..

Therefore, I will personally contact each one of you that have agreed to be a part of this. As this will be an on going project, some will be contacted earlier, some will be later. Walau macam mana sekalipun... insyaAllah, you all will have the chance to send your love :)

Oh ya, there will be circumstances that I could not reveal the names of patients that you are sending the cards to.. but i will describe briefly how he /she is.Hope you understand that.. as to respect the parents/ family wishes. Once done, you can send it to me ( I will let you know my address in personal message )

Here goes the DOs & DON'Ts

1. Send cheery & ceria cards.. cards that will make them smile. For the patients, can use " Wishing You Well" , " Take Care " , "My Prayers With You "
2. Can send small items i.e. stickers, stationery, magazine..( but as you have to send to me, mahal pulak hantar yg ringan je lah )
3. Can actually tell who you are.. kerja apa or so love stories
4. Cards for the siblings can be like " Good Luck For Your Exam"," Best Wishes "
5. Cards for parents, can be like " We Are Here For You", " Take Care "

The most important thing is.. we are here trying to make them happy & smile. Please do not seal, as I will go through all cards..

1. Please refrain from saying " Get Well Soon" or " Get Better " ..or anything similar.. as there are cases that might not have cure and sadly may not get better.
2. I have experienced hearing someone asked the parents.. " Puan redha? " Please avoid that kind of questions..
3. Do not send any food or candy, as some have allergies and are diabetics
4. Do not add glitters or confetti, as the children might be opening the cards at the ward / on the hospital beds
5. Do not send USED stuff animal. Some have very low immune system.. best to buy new :)

There you go, list of the DOs and DON'Ts. However, please feel free to message me or e mail me if there are doubts. No worries... I am here to share my experiences :)

Thank you so much. Will be looking forward to your cards.. :)

Project " Sincerely Yours "

I have been contacted by numbers of friends and strangers (new friends now :) ) who wanted to be a part of Wishing Well Programme. As I am not an NGO ( Wishing Well Programme is a thing that I personally wanted to do and being supported strongly by AMAZING people around me, all praise to the Almighty ), it is quite difficult for me to gather everyone at one time.

However, I welcome all extended hands with an open arm. That is how this project " Sincerely Yours " came about.

"Sincerely Yours" is a project showing support to the patient, parents and siblings through the difficult moments. Individuals can send cards/ mail / small gift to the patients as well as to the parents and siblings ( siblings need support too! )

I truly understand when some of my friends told me that even though they wanted to visit and meet the children at the ward, they are just so worried that they might break down. Therefore, I think "Sincerely Yours" will be a good "platform" to be with the children and their family... something like, " jauh di mata, dekat di hati :) "

Those who are interested to be a part of this project, you are most welcome.. just let me know yea :)

There will be a guideline of DOs and DONT's .. I will post on that real soon :)

As Wishing Well Programme is a programme about bringing happiness, smile and laughter in the children who are battling with illness in their life... I believe, insyaAllah, with His permission..project "Yours Sincerely " will be able to deliver that result.... tak banyak pun sikit, insyaAllah..

p/s honestly... i think a personally hand written is cool.. oh yes.. a CHEERY and CERIA card is the BEST ! :)

May Allah bless you all....

The Boy Who Has Touched My Heart

He will always have a special place in my heart. His courage and his humbleness always made me feel so small compared to him. He is only 15 years old, but honestly.. he is very matured for his age.

Adik Hazim is a Stage 4 Non-Hodgkin Lymphoma patient. He has been in and out of hospital, went through critical situations for a few times and yet, he never give up.

I thank Allah SWT for crossing my path with Adik Hazim. Syukur Allhamdulillah. He is a gift for me. Honestly, he is the boy who has touched my heart.

He knew medically, there is no more treatment for him. We ( Hazim & I ) even had a conversation on what & how death will be.

Yet, he never give up. He has started preparing for his PMR next year.

Note: He is supposed to sit for PMR this year, but due to his illness, he has not attended school at all this year. He will be in form 3 again next year.

May Allah bless Hazim & his family.. and may Allah bless you too..

What Soothes Him

Syukur Alhamdulillah, Allah SWT blessed me with wonderful friends. Friends who believed in me.. and one of the most precious thing is friends who endlessly supporting me in things I do.

Coy sent me a box of origami papers & origami books for me to learn. All this while, during my 4 years stay in Japan, I never ever took the chance to learn origami ( teruk betul :p ).. the love for the children changed me... and thanks to Coy who gave me the idea, I finally knew how to fold a fish and a crane :)

That was what soothes Adik Qayyum yesterday. He was having pain during the blood transfusion. Semua jadi tak kena. When I asked the nurse & his grandma ( parents have to be away on urgent matters ) what is wrong.. they told me that the blood transfusion is very painful.

Origami came to the rescue. Trying my best to distract him, he started requesting for one after another fish & crane ( walaupun tak berapa lawa, boleh la..;) )

When Mr. Hj. Aznil asked me.. how can a non-medical related people help the little heroes.. I said , there are many ways. Emm.. perhaps folding origami papers?

Adik Qayyum fell asleep during the transfusion.. his grandma were right next to him, stroking his little hands.

In his hands.. holding the red paper fish tightly...

May Allah bless you my dear friend, Coy.. and may Allah bless all of you too...

A Shoulder To Cry On

Dear all,

I have been receiving a lot of messages today.. I thank you all for your love, care and support. Wishing Well Programme has been receiving tremendous support and prayers, Subhanallah. I thank Allah SWT for His blessing.. semua yang berlaku adalah dengan keizinanNya..

While browsing the net today, I came across this song by Tommy Page. A song that I like so much during my teenager years... This would explain what Wishing Well Programme is all about...

Life is full of lots of up and downs,
And the distance feels further when you're headed for the ground,
And there is nothing more painful than to let your feelings take you down,
It's so hard to know the way you feel inside,
When there's many thoughts and feelings that you hide,
But you might feel better if you let me walk with you by your side,

And when you need a shoulder to cry on,
When you need a friend to rely on,
When the whole world is gone,
You won't be alone, cause I'll be there,
I'll be your shoulder to cry on,
I'll be there,
I'll be a friend to rely on,
When the whole world is gone,
You won't be alone, cause I'll be there.

All of the times when everything is wrong
And you're feeling like
There's no use going on
You can't give it up
I hope you work it out and carry on
Side by side,
With you till the end
I'll always be the one to firmly hold your hand
No matter what is said or done
Our love will always continue on

Everyone needs a shoulder to cry on
Everyone needs a friend to rely on
When the whole world is gone
You won't be alone cause I'll be there
I'll be your shoulder to cry on
I'll be there
I'll be the one you rely on
When the whole world's gone
You won't be alone
Cause I'll be there!

And when the whole world is gone
You'll always have my shoulder to cry on....

Thank you for all support, care, prayers and love.

May Allah bless you all...

with loves,

Al Fatihah buat Allahyarham Khayrul Aiman

.. Adik Khayrul Aiman telah pulang ke Rahmatullah pada 7 Oktober 2009, pukul 10:30 malam. Al Fatihah..

Semoga rohnya dicucuri rahmat.. Amin..

Small To Us, Huge To Them

Sometimes in life, we do not know how our act will impact someone. Regardless of who we are and what we do, insyaAllah, with His blessing, every good intention will be bringing a positive impact towards the recipient.

I thank Allah SWT when I heard that Adik Ng Yee Lin is fighting her very best undergoing the chemotherapy while Adik Hazim is preparing himself to sit for PMR next year. The best news received yesterday was, Adik Aiman's parents are no longer losing hope. They are back on their feet again.. and will try their best to get the best treatment for their little hero.

These are some of the real stories that are happening around us. I always believe, after every hurricane, there will be a rainbow somewhere. To know that they are not giving up, is a priceless gift that Allah SWT gave. Syukur Alhamdulillah..

No matter what we do in life.. students, professionals, home makers, artist, politicians, or even if you are still looking for a job ( i wish you the very best ).. in my eyes, everyone has the potential in bringing happiness to the children who are battling in their life.

To those who have contacted me offering their help..I thank you so much and welcome you with an open arm.. :)

Sometimes we feel that what we do is too small.. believe me, it may be huge to them.. insyaAllah..

All we have to do is have faith in Him. He knows the best.. insyaAllah..

May Allah bless you..

Si Cilik Peminat Naruto

Ramai yang bertanyakan pada saya tentang keadaan Adik Ng Yee Lin. Berikut adalah SMS yang diterima daripada bapa Adik Yee Lin tadi ( 5 Oktober 2009 )

"Keadaan Yee Lin baik sekarang, terima kasih. Yee Lin sudah tak perlu masuk ubat anti virus lagi dan sudah sambung dengan rawatan kimoterapi pada Jumaat lalu. kami diberitahu dari doktor bahawa kalau keadaan Yee Lin stabil, kami sudah boleh bawa balik rumah tak lama lagi"

Syukur alhamdulillah..

This little girl is proceeding with chemotherapy as the anti fungal treatment completed. Thank you all.... FOR EVERYTHING...

May Allah Bless You ..

It Ain't Over Till It's Over

"Ajal maut di tangan Tuhan... "

That is very true. None of us would know when is the time for us to return to the Creator. What we can do is, try at the very best in everything that we do and leave the fate to Allah SWT.

That is what the Wishing Well Programme is all about. We are not giving them hope.. but all we wanted to do is to let the children and their family knows that.. it ain't over till it's over.They have us who loves them very much. I personally do not like the "Last Wish" term. But, at crucial moments, I would use it based on the health situation.

However, it is all in the God's hands. For us here, we will try our best to help the children to be a child. Full of fun, laughter and at the same time, "kena dengar cakap orang tua juga" :)

Syukur alhamdulillah, Adik Hazim Husaini has turned 15 years old last Thursday. When I first met him, I was told not to wait for his birthday.. as that may not come.

As at yesterday, Adik Khayrul Aiman started eating and taking his medicine again. Syukur Alhamdulillah.. I told Pak Nil about it. I believe.. he is calling Adik Aiman's parents anytime soon... insyaAllah... :)

I truly believe, being happy does help in process of getting better. It is not us to decide when is the time.. Hanya Allah SWT sahaja yang menentukan..

It ain't over till it's over.. Wallahualam..

May Allah bless you ..

Yours Truly

" Dabi, have you said thank you to those who helped you?" asked my parents last night. I remembered I did to some, but I am pretty sure I have missed a few. Thank you mak & ayah for always keeping me in the right track.

This note is specially dedicated to all who is reading it, right now.

In the early years of my involvement with childhood cancer patients, a friend of mine, who has lost her son due to cancer, told me this... " There are times when we, who have children with cancer broke down when we saw the other children who are in the same situation. Davie, we need you to be strong." That was many years back..and I kept it strongly in my heart.

Honestly, it is not easy to hold back tears, especially when the mothers hug me. But you know what, I thank you to Allah SWT for giving me the chance to know all of you.If there is a way, I would like meet in you in person and express my gratitude for your prayers, trust and support in every programmes/projects that I do. Every prayers, trust,emotional encouragements and supports in all ways that you gave, made me stronger every day. It is very meaningful to me.

Thank you to my parents, siblings and relatives who have been supporting me for 33 years.. I love u so much
Thank you to all my friends who accepted me for the way I am and endlessly supporting me.. I love u and you all are AMAZING!
Thank you to all who have been following my notes/blog.. my love goes to you too.. your prayers are important to me

Honestly, deep from my heart, THANK YOU SO MUCH.

Most important of all... THANK YOU Allah SWT for the blessing that You gave...

May Allah bless you all

p/s I know some of you have posted my notes in your blog/facebook.. kindly share this notes with your friends too.. as I did read their comments. My gratitude goes to your friends too...

Yours truly,

For The Little Boy

Everything happened so fast. When I called hospital, is just a normal follow up that i do, especially that I have been away for Eid. Never crossed my mind that, I received a bad news.

I called the mother immediately. Once she heard my voice, she cried. Enough for me to know what the situation is. Soon after, started numbers of phone calls, sms and messages floating in the air. All for the little boy.

Adik Aiman really adores Mr.Hj. Aznil Hj. Nawawi, or famously known as Pak Nil. Ever since Adik Aiman met Pak Nil by coincidence, the photo that was taken is like Adik Aiman's precious treasure.

At 6 years old, Adik Aiman is fighting the pain at a degree that maybe some of us may not even have experienced before. The least I could do is... to help him get some of the wishes.

Syukur Alhamdulillah.. Pak Nil spent almost 1 and a half hour at Adik Aiman's house. Adik Aiman is in pain, not much conversations can be held.. but I saw Adik Aiman turned and looked at Pak Nil closely...maybe ,who knows.. in his heart saying..."Yeay! Pak Nil datang!! "

In dealing with this crucial moment.. everyone who loves and knows Adik Aiman need the moral support.His parents,siblings, relatives, friends... all need the strength to be strong..

Allah SWT has put all of us together.. in helping them to go through this difficult moment.. Subhanallah..

I thank you all of you for helping me to reach Mr.Hj. Aznil Hj. Nawawi. Only Allah SWT can repay back your kindness.

To Mr. Hj Aznil, AC and their friend ( sorry, I could not recall his name ).. thank you so much

p/s Pak Nil gave Adik Aiman a bottle of "air zam zam" that he brought back from his pilgrimage last year. Oh yes, Adik Aiman also received a Tom Tom Bak T-shirt and a cap. He hold it very tightly.

May Allah bless you all...